I Hide My Eyes

When I am feeling emotions that I do not like or want to show then I actually cover , or hide my eyes. This can be done by putting my head in my hands or binding my eyes with something such as cloth. This stops others seeing the emotions and makes me feel safer. Its kind of like a hug from a person. It makes you feel like the world isn’t so huge and scary. Not being able to see makes me feel like there bad things out there don’t actually exist and the ones that do can't see my pain. I am also scared of crowds so it makes me feel like the crowds aren’t so big and aren’t all looking at me.

I also broke my rule about never rhyming and this is a example why I don’t do it. I have stuffed up the rhyming pattern. I did write it during a theatre performance so that’s probably the reason for the poor rhyming.

I hope you like it

I Hide My Eyes

I hide my eyes

I can not see

There hidden from

 all those around me.

My hidden eyes

Stop’s the show

Of dark emotions

From deep below

As I stare through blinded eyes

I miss the glances

Of passes by

I hade away from my fears

And bottle up my unshed tears

If I can’t see then neither can they

The feelings that’ve returned

From far away

I fight, trying to hold them back

But fall to my knees and am

Beaten back

Slammed into the wall and lying

Curled into a ball, heart dying

Cut up inside my body lies

Blind eyes stare blankly at

Broken skies

My mind is swamped

 with doubt and lies

and in that haze my

 mind decides

that every face wears

 accusing eyes

so I stay scared, overwhelmed

wishing for a place to call my own

wishing for she I can call mine

unseen tears fall from sightless eyes

 

Mind of a Masochist

I have always been interested in the idea's of sadism and masochism. this poem is my idea of how a masochist whould think. I find it interesting. i have to say: most of my poems are based around some truth but this one Isn't. It is very dark and there is more dark ones coming.

Mind of a masochist  

I scream as I cut again,

Yes!! Ahhh the Punishment, I giggle through my tears.

I deserve this . this pain is the punishment for my crimes. My screams mixed with manic laughter, echo through my brain as the knife drops from my grasp.

The loud clatter it makes as it hits the floor struggles to be heard over the echoing screams still bouncing around my skull.

I stare at it for a moment, just as the echo’s pass then follow it down as the world faids to red.

Its only quick, then I’m on the ground. Vision clearing as I lay there with my heart pounding, head throbbing, blood pouring.

I let out something, a mixture between a sob and a laugh as I fumble around blindly for the knife, hand eventaly connecting with the sliperly blood soaked handle, holding it for strength before I try to rise but pause, waiting to regain strength.

When I’m ready I try again, grabbing a near by wall as I struggle to lift my shaking body on to legs of rubber. I latch onto a table which I use to get me stager into a standing position, I stand there swaying , staggering around trying to stay upright and make a shaky step forwards.

My vision blurs as I stumble, crashing into some unseen object and fall. Vision disappearing. Then there is pain again, greeting me as I fall, fall into the endless oblivion of darkness  

Don't forget to smile : )

Hey peeps
im "smily face" , one of cleftlipkids friends
i wrote this poem because i was bored and one of friends from church was going through a rough time with dipression so i just wrote this poem to help lift there spirits. being a christian also helped so yeh hopfully this will also have n impact on your life.

Here is a little something to read when feeling down
What ever you do Never frown
for some one out there is thinking of you.
You might not know who,
you might not know why,
what ever it is try not to cry.

That last bid didn't make sence
but hey god knows why,
he's looking down at you right now
with love in his heart,
you might not know why
but hey you're loved.

NOW PLEASE STOP THINKING ABOUT KILLING PEOPLE!!!
cause that only leads to more pain.
if your feeling down sing Monty Python,
it might not do much but at least its somethin.

Now remember this when life sucks,

"worse things happened at sea you know"
"Always look on the bright side of life"
and......

DON'T FORGET TO SMILE

Young love and rejection: addicted to a certain kind of sadness

Young love: it’s a good thing, when it works. When it doesn’t it destroys you and when its all you have been hanging on to it hurts so much more. I wrote this while getting over some a person.  It’s the story of some one just me who just can't give up, just can't forget even though he knows its useless. It’s sad poem that I contains broken hearts and shattered hopes.

Addicted to a certain kind of sadness

“Your love will never be mine”

In my head this is crystal clear,

But my heart is still clinging to that sliver of hope.

The hope, the dream you could be mine.

The sadness hurts but the hope hurts more.

But I can’t seem to give up on it.

I am addicted to a certain kind of sadness,

It’s called you

“The quicker you realise, the quicker it healing starts”

But how can you change your feelings for some one?

Especially ones so strong

Yes the sadness hurts

But I can’t bring myself to let go of that tiny bit of hope

That has been keeping me going.

I’m addicted to the pain

I’m addicted to the sadness

I’m addicted to you  

HappySadFacedMaskedOne: for a friend

I decided to write this poem for a friend who was going through a hard time. The idea behind this was she always seemed happy, always care free, it was only when you dug deeper that you discovered it was all a mask. A happy mask that covered a sad face, so thus the name HappySadFacedMaskedOne came around. Later on I realised that the name also applied to me so I took the name on my self. And if u google said name you will get my steam profile ( I am the only one with the name J)

I wrote it to show her that she isn’t alone and that I really appreciate all the help she had given me.

 I succeeded. Here it is

Hidden behind a mask of smiles

Is a face that is hiding tears.

Deep beneath that happy exterior

Is a person going through emotional trauma.

But this person has a way with words.

This loving, caring person

Doesn’t let her pain break her will,

but strengthen her,

teach her, not tear her apart.

She uses her pain to help others in need.

But she can’t always suffer in silence,

No shouldn’t, shouldn’t have to.

But we don’t always get what we want do we?

But there may be method in her madness

A flash of brilliance in a dark time.

Is that light at the end of the tunnel,

Or is it your eyes?

It can be whatever you chose.

Doesn’t it suck to have the one you love not even know you exist?

Well yes but if it helps I know how you feel.

Of you keep on working you will reap the rewards,

The harder you work the sweeter the reward ey?

Well all i can say is stay strong happy sad.

You can get there,

It may seem futile at times but it is never futile.

Never stop trying happy sad one,

You are not alone.

Happy sad masked one

You are not alone

So thankyou because of you neither am I.

  

First Post: Behind a wall of hair.

Hellow folks.
For a first post i thought i might start with a short one.
This one is called behind a wall of hair. it is writen around the idea me wanting to be able to hide behind my hair( i have long curly hair) and go to a different place and be a different person.

Behind a wall of hair is a land of good and evil.
It is a place, a safe haven for happiness, a light house of happiness surrounded by a vast raging sea of tears.
But also a place of darkness. A harbour for fear to stop into on its long lonely voyage on the sea of tears.
A place where the evil is hidden from the unknowing, uncaring world.
When I go there I can do what I want, I can be who I want to be: anyone but who I am, and face the world as a different person from a different view .One that doesn’t carry the burden of my scars, one who doesn’t suffer,
One were the consequences are smaller and emotions hidden
Some where, behind a wall of hair.

It is only short but i think it is direct and to the point.
there will be more coming soon as i get this started

till then

cleft out