This poem is kinda strange. I like the imagary in the start but it just got
really really really really really weird after that. i think it needs more work
A swirling torrent of emotoins
A rushing cascade of thoughts
Bombarding me
Overwhelming me
I slip beneath the surface
Choaking on my unstable thoughts
They fill my mouth and rush down my throat
Overwhelming me and overpowering me
Till I am unable to fight
Unable to struggle
Unable to live
The idea is there, and that's the most important. :) Personally, I feel like the poem just moves along too quickly, especially the second stanza.
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